dani anihilation

I`ve been up since about 7 o` clock this morning . I don`t know why though, my dog wouldn`t stop barking and I thought I`d be able to go back to sleep , but I couldn`t . Things are just ... I don`t know . Boring ? Unentertaining ? Completley pointless ? It`s funny . A few months ago , I told myself I would never Leave PRO ( pretty ricky online . us ) and stop being a member , but lately it`s just so negative and pointless that I just stopped logging on . It was a straight popularity contest . The majority of the people had been on that board since 2006 . So someone get's online & makes a post and they FLOCK to go talk to them. Then five minutes later there `s an 8 page post about an inside joke that has me sitting there like "huh?!" . Not only that, the siggy`s are plastered with YIM conversations .. more inside jokes nonetheless . Then random conferences I wasn't apart of because , like a normal person , I was alseep at 2 in the morning, not sitting on the computer. Like I said I was leaving and I get about a few minutes of "No , don`t leave . " Then you`re forgotten .

Wow , big fuckin` deal Kayla ?! Shut up & Let it Go ! It`s the internet .

I know, I`m getting way to worked up over something extremely trivial . But if you`ve been left out for the majority of your life , being left out on the fucking internet starts to become a big deal . Remember , the insecurities . It`s like I can turn something so trivial and pointless into a big deal and it all leads back to my insecurities .

I understand that alot of board`s will have those people who stay on it , so they talk to each other the majority of the time . But that`s a small percentage . On PRO , that`s the majority . ( Wait , I have more griping to do . ) Not only is it a virtual personality contest , it`s like a conflict between what`s percived as a true fan or an "illiterate". Yet those same people who sit there & use their fonts to call other people out as ignorant can barely defend themselves without soemthing turning into DRAMA . Everyone on that board has no TRUE sense of humor . They rather make fun of others , but when it`s turned on them , DRAAAAMAAA . They quickly say the drama spouts from the number of "young girls" on the board . Young girls like 12 - 13 . Yet it`s not the young girls , it`s everyone . & The whole "true fan" thing . [ sighs ] That`s where the root of the conflict started. By judging other people ... by saying that these people are not a true fan because they don`t do that same thing you do is what starts the conflict . Yet the SAAAME people can`t even truely say they`re a true fan themselves . Something like that a person defines themselves . It`s wrong to try and force other people to YOUR standards . Everyone is different and shows their love & appreciation in different ways .

I Said I`ll give it two weeks without me . I`ll go back if I change my mind & my feelings about the attitude of the people . If I do , it`s only because I miss the convo`s I used to have with Pansy .

It`s like high school . But I graduated early .